gut punching

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Brodie and Josh are two rising superstars on the Rock Hard roster, and have come a long way since their debuts last year. These two teenagers work out hard in the gym, carving out incredible muscular bodies that look like they jumped off the pages of a recent health and fitness magazine. As you may know, they have squared off against one another in singles competition with the teen bodybuilder Brodie narrowly chalking up a victory over the bronzed, surfer boy Josh. Considering the success that they have both experienced in recent matches, they chose to team up their muscles and take on the resident bad boy, Ethan, and his current protégé, Aaron, intent on proving their amazing physiques are up to the challenge of putting the bad boys in their place. Round one opens with Brodie in his signature red square cuts and black boot and Josh in blue square cuts and white boots, which highlight his golden bronzed body. In the opposite corner, the bad boy and his protégé are in their black and gold metallic trunks with black boots, eagerly awaiting their chance at taking out the teen muscle boys. First up in this round is Brodie and the rookie, Aaron. Brodie wastes no time in gaining the advantage over the protégé, securing Aaron in a tight, side headlock, stretching him out in a full nelson and grapevine combination, pounding and stomping away at his abs while he’s double teamed in the corner, then picks him up and drops Aaron across his knee into an over the knee backbreaker. Aaron doesn’t even get an offensive shot in on the teen bodybuilder before he’s looking to take in his mentor to take over. While Aaron tags in Ethan, Brodie tags in Josh and these two lock up at center ring. Ethan put an MMA style beating on the blond surfer dude in their previous singles match, and he takes the control again in this encounter. He backs Josh into the corner, delivers a few shoulder trusts into his gut, suplexes him down to the mat, then straddles Josh and starts bashing away at his abs of steel. Ethan is relentless, and continues to impose his will with a series of holds that make Josh suffer and Ethan delight. He tosses the shaggy haired blond around the ring like he was his own personal play toy. The bad boy stretches, pulls, and contorts every muscle in Josh’s fantastic physique, obviously enjoying himself all the while! Ethan even taunts Brodie, saying ‘look at your partner now’ as he has Josh in a reverse head lock and draped across his knee, then he bashes away some more on Josh’s pristine abs. Ethan is in total control, that is, until Brodie decides he’s seen enough and jumps over the top rope into the ring to help his partner. Brodie and Josh back the skinny street punk into a corner and start to stomp and pound away, until Ethan seizes a split second opening and tags Aaron. Josh immediately takes control over the less experienced and smaller opponent, throwing him to the mat before double teaming him in the ropes while Brodie places Aaron in a full nelson and Josh stomps away on his chest with his size 11 white boots. Josh is now the muscle boy clearly in control of this match, placing Aaron in a seated surfboard and stretching the rookie out in search of a submission. When Aaron won’t submit, Josh picks him up, then puts him through the same punishment. Josh places Aaron in another seated surfboard, but this time exerts intense pressure, forcing Aaron to his feet as he looks for anyway to escape Josh’s raw muscular power and the agonizing pain. With Aaron standing and screaming with nowhere to escape, and his bad boy partner helpless on the other side of the ring, Josh forces the rookie to submit to the surfboard as Aaron screams out a submission. Round one goes to the muscle studs as they proudly pose their fantastic physiques over their defeated opponent.

Round two opens with Josh beaming with confidence in his corner, and Aaron seemingly hesitant to continue as he hobbles out of the opposite corner. The shaggy, blond muscle hunk quickly takes the rookie down to the mat and starts attacking his abs. Ethan tries to encourage his partner to fight back but it’s looking like Ethan is the only one who has any fight left on his team. Josh dishes out the punishment on Aaron before he is able to crawl across the mat and tag in Ethan. The resident bad boy climbs through the ropes and states ‘you’re mine now dude’ as he catches Josh in a headlock, takes him to the mat, then starts grinding away on Josh’s fine-looking face. Don’t know what it is, but Ethan simply has Josh’s number! He lifts the bronzed surfer dude up and drops him into an over the knee backbreaker, stretching his stunning body out on display. Josh takes a beating until he is able to back the street punk against the ropes where Brodie is eagerly awaiting, and locks in a full nelson on Ethan and the two muscle boys start dishing out a 2 on 1 beat down. Ethan is able to break free and tag in Aaron, but that doesn’t change the dynamics of this match. It’s more of the same as the energetic, teen muscle boys continue to dominate the rookie. Ethan does get back into the ring, and gains an advantage over Brodie, stretching his magnificent muscles out in an over the knee backbreaker, but when Brodie is able to reverse the action in the corner he lifts the bad boy up only to power slam him down on the mat. He works Ethan over; stretching him out on the mat, scissoring his tree trunk sized thighs across the bad boy’s 29 inch waist and squeezing the life out of him, then double teaming him in the corner with excessive pounding and stomping away on his abs, softening him for the kill. The teen bodybuilder hoists the resident bad boy up onto his back into a crucifix, and as Ethan is stretched out helpless across Brodie’s back, Josh whacks away at his abs until he can’t take it any longer and reluctantly cries out a submission. The two teenage muscle studs chalk up a well-earned victory, and flex their smoking hot, sweaty muscles as the bad boy Ethan lay helpless and bulging on the mat.

A Taste of Your Own Medicine

Skrapper has a huge reputation around the locker rooms at BG East, much bigger than his lean body might imply. He’s more than held his own against much (MUCH!) bigger opponents. He likes hurting guys, and taking a little punishment along the way does nothing but ignite his lust to lay on some more hurt in reply. Any opponent, no matter how big, how bad, how skilled who fails to bring his A-game against Skrapper learns the hard way that the vicious and absolutely fearless little badger is not to be taken for granted.

If he isn’t facing overwhelming odds, Skrapper isn’t interested. If an opponent doesn’t outweigh him by at least 50 pounds (aka Dev Michaels, Brook Stetson, Mitch Colby) then Skrapper typically doesn’t consider him to be worth the effort. But Jake Jenkins, while shorter and about the same weight as Skrapper, has built a reputation at BG East as a master tactician on the mats. Jake’s extensive success in amateur wrestling was enough to pique Skrapper’s interest. He invited Jake to get in a little “practice” with him, to see if the babyface muscle boy is as dangerous (and as pretty…) as he’s heard.

“What’s with the gloves?” Jake asks when he arrives, finding Skrapper sporting sparring gloves. “We’re going to be boxing today, is that cool? Ready to box, dude?” Skrapper asks, immediately circling and jabbing, putting the pretty boy on defense and using Jake’s luscious pecs as speed bags. With calm, practiced skill Jake lets fly a blurring combination of punches that back Skrapper into the wall. Punch for punch, he matches Skrapper’s offense and then some. When Skrapper lands a particularly stunning jab, Jake abruptly steps backward and drives a rocking round house kick to the shoulder of his astonished opponent. Mat wrestling, boxing, kickboxing… what the heck can’t Jake Jenkins do!?

“Practice” to Skrapper isn’t the same as practice to anybody else! The more skillfully Jake neutralizes his offense, the more vicious the Skrapper gets. He slams the muscle boy into the wall and pins his throat there with a forearm while driving punches into his muscled core. “What the fuck, man!” Jake snarls furiously, pounding his way free and looking at his lanky “practice partner” with new and now challenging and threatening eyes.

Few opponents have managed to get Jake’s blood boiling, but leave it to Skrapper to have him in a rage within minutes. The former amateur champ takes Skrapper to the mats and unleashes a master clinic of speed, strength and skill that leaves Skrapper unable to guess where the next attack is coming from. Taking Skrapper’s back and wrapping his powerful right arm across his throat, Jake applies a wickedly tight rear naked choke that makes Skrapper’s eyes roll momentarily into the back of his head. “How’s that feel?!” the normally unflappable Jake snaps angrily. “How do you like a taste of your own medicine!?”

The intensity between these two pissed off, testosterone-fueled battlers is incendiary! Skrapper slides off his baggy trunks and chokes the muscle boy with them. “That rough enough, dude!?” Skrapper taunts. Momentarily dazed, Jake’s shorts also get peeled, leaving him to fight wearing nothing but his already sweat-stained tighty-whities. A slap to Jake’s face is one aggressive step too far, as it seems to clear the dangerous mat battler’s head. With momentum firmly back in his court, Jake schoolboy pins his cocky opponent and then pounds the living shit out of Skrapper’s chest in satisfying revenge.

Jake outmuscles and outmaneuvers Skrapper repeatedly, prying, stretching, pounding and squeezing his lean body in an accomplished string of punishing holds. Nobody, but nobody gets a quick submission from Skrapper. Sweat pours off Jake’s body in sheets as his lion-hearted opponent takes a mountain of punishment and then keeps clawing his way back up for more. “Where are you getting this energy!” Jake joins a long line of astonished opponents in asking, as Skrapper launches yet another swarming offense.

Skrapper has only one gear ? full speed. With a stunning reverse boston crab he bends Jake unnaturally, the muscleboy’s face pressed into the mat, until the shocked wrestler submits. “Who’s talking shit now, huh?” Skrapper taunts. “Whattaya gotta say now?!”

Slicked down in thick sheets of sweat, both bodies are hard to hold but the pace doesn’t let up for a moment. Provoked and taking it personally, Jake literally drags Skrapper’s face aross the sweat-stained mat. The muscle boy’s body shimmers beautifully as he slides into a tendon-snapping full nelson that violently wrenches out an incredibly reluctant submission from the scrappy one. Flinging his opponent to the floor, Jake flexes his dripping muscles in celebration, snarling down at his aching opponent, and growling, “Asshole!”

Jake and Skrapper share the same credo regarding conceding defeat: if you’re conscious, you keep fighting! Submission after submission, they throw their bodies back into the sweaty, slippery fray until one of them delivers not one, but two brain-rattling bulldogs. “Say goodnight,” the victor snarls, flexing overtop of his KO’d opponent. “You know what!?” he snaps, looking down at his helpless foe. “I’ll just take advantage while you’re knocked out!” Stretching his soaked body across his opponent’s motionless shoulders, the winner slaps down a humiliatingly slow, crowing, cocky 3-count. Dude. You’re pinned!

So That’s What Ned’s Thinking!

What the hell was Ned Norris thinking!? He made a special request for this match against one of BG East’s most successful and prolific wrestlers, Joshua Goodman. Of course, we know that Ned can “enjoy” a severe beating. The batterings he suffered at the hands of both JP Riley and the infamous Brooklyn Bodywrecker proved that Ned can certainly make the most out of suffering humiliating corporal punishment. But you have to wonder what Ned is expecting to happen when he climbs into the ring and slides in nice and close, directly behind Joshua, and compares muscles with the stunningly ripped fitness model. Perhaps more importantly, you have to wonder whether his Dark Knight master, BBW, sanctioned Ned’s return to the BG East ring against dangerous beauty, Mr. J!

Mr. Joshua (as he insists on being called) has been on a tear since first arriving at BGE many years ago. Every inch as incredibly hot and muscled as he was from day one, Joshua has gone on to become one of the most prolific and successful wrestlers in the history of BG East. He has long ago lost count of how many opponents he has punished for daring to stand in between him and the mirror. Mr. Joshua’s fans, however, have been unflappable in their fanatical admiration of his stunning muscles, his top dog personality, and most of all, the epically massive bulge he’s barely able to stuff down the front of his trunks (causing him to adjust frequently).

No one loves the sight of Josh’s gorgeous muscles nearly as much as Mr. J himself, so perhaps that’s what Ned Norris is thinking when he presses up so closely behind the notorious narcissist, peering over top of Joshua’s mountainous biceps to see exactly what Mr. J sees staring back at him in the mirror. “Don’t even think about coming over here and messing up my game!” Joshua warns. When Ned dares to lift his own relatively modest arms in comparison, Joshua drives his leg backward between Ned’s outstretched thighs, racking his opponent’s balls and then bulldogs Ned flat on his face in the middle of the ring. “I told you to stay away!” Mr. Joshua snarls, resuming his self-worship.

When you can take as much pain as we’ve seen Ned endure at the hands of BBW, it should come as no surprise that although Joshua repeatedly levels him, Ned persistently peels himself up off the mat and climbs back to his feet. “You gotta be shitting me!” Joshua growls, shaking his head in disbelief as Ned asks for more. You can set your watch on the reliable fact that Joshua is going to give him more! A standing head scissors, bouncing on the balls of his feet makes Ned go limp even as it makes Joshua’s famous pouch bounce. Transitioning to a beautiful scissor-choke, he makes his challenger flail and flop, as Joshua calmly flexes his bulging, tanned arm in Ned’s face. “Look at those 14-inch forearms! My forearms are about as big as your arms!”

Joshua continuously flexes for his own entertainment, and enjoys watching his stunning physique in the act of complete domination. A particularly vicious standing headscissors forces Ned’s face upward, staring up at the luscious, muscled ass of the physique star. Mr. J laughs, flexing his biceps and crunching his six-pack abs. Determinedly, Ned reaches up with both hands, grabs hold of the sides of Joshua’s blue trunks, and begins to drag them down his powerful thighs! NOW we know what Ned’s been thinking all along!

Joshua just barely manages to stop Ned from launching himself into instant legendary status by being the first opponent to show fans exactly what Mr. J is packing down the front of his trunks. With Ned’s secret desire exposed, Mr. J’s destructive path grows more focused. He locks BBW’s jobber up nice and tight in a crotch-to-face headscissors, forcing his awestruck challenger to stare up at that big trophy package. He rolls him up into a crotch-ripping small package, positioning his hips directly over Ned’s head and grinding that huge bulge into his face. “Take those big balls in your mouth!” Joshua commands.

Sooner or later, every hardbodied narcissist can’t help but become distracted by the sight of his own beauty staring back at him in the mirror mounted ringside (heck, that’s pretty much the whole point of the wall mirror!). True to form, Joshua’s focus on destroying Ned wavers as he marvels at his chiseled muscles, and opportunistic Ned instantly makes him pay. Ned targets Mr. Joshua’s pride-and-joy abdominal muscles. Punches soften him up, but it’s Ned’s fingers digging deep into Joshua’s abdominal wall that really make the hardbodied hottie squirm. Having been tortured by the best, Ned knows just how to make the most of a vulnerable opponent. He kicks his legs in the air and repeatedly drives his knee into the battered arm or across Joshua’s increasingly reddened midsection.

Having revealed his ulterior motive for signing for the match, Ned is determined to lay waste to the notorious Mr. J and unwrap his infamous package as a gift to BGE fans. Sensing his vulnerability, Josh isn’t about to let Ned take the gold without a brutal fight. When Ned launches himself into the air to deliver a high impact belly-to-belly splash, Mr. J manages to pull his knees up to his chest, sending Ned bouncing across the ring in agony. Demonstrating arguably his most impressive move of all, Joshua shoves his hand down the front of his trunks to rearrange the oversized baggage he’s packed.

You’ve got to hand it to Ned. Some of Josh’s opponents over the years have had their sights set on deflating his gargantuan ego. Quite a few have made no bones about their plans to exact payback for the withering, demeaning, dismissive trash talk he shovels out at the start of every match. A few opponents have even made a point of targeting Mr. J’s pendulous package for concentrated, ball bashing torture. Ned, on the other hand, is going to count it a singular victory if he can just free the crotch monster that has taunted and haunted fans for years. The brutality poured out across the BGE ring matches these suddenly epic stakes, possibly the highest stakes that Mr. Joshua has ever faced. The climactic conclusion features one of these fierce wrestlers, chest heaving, flexing overtop of his humiliated opponent, and crowing victoriously, “The fans are going to love it!”

Long-Awaited Underground Wrestling Super Stars Main Event!

Sure, Ethan Axel Andrews is tough and seemingly fearless and willing to take on any and all comers, from one coast to the other and in any wrestling federation which will host him. But who knows what was in Ethan’s head when he signed up for THIS match against Jonny Firestorm! Besides the fact that Jonny’s built like a wrecking ball these days, Ethan surely must know or has at least heard that Jonny’s still picking shreds of wrestlers much bigger and more experienced than Andrews from between his teeth. Yes, there would some serious and critical cache, not to mention money, in chalking up a victory over one of BG East’s premiere attractions and purportedly one of its toughest grapplers and most gifted grafters. Was it hubris? Ambition? An over-sized sense of self? Lust? What?

And it’s hard to imagine what possessed him to insist on fighting Jonny according to MMA submissions-only rules, no holds barred. And, on top of everything else, he calls for this surefire debacle right after his own humiliating defeat in a loser-gets-scalped hair match against Lon Dumont? Is Ethan Axel Andrews certifiably insane? Or does he believe, by sheer blind faith, against reason, that his luck is bound to change if only he takes on the toughest challenge of his entire wrestling career? Or does he have a hidden motive?

Jonny has seen it all and done it all, it seems like. In his early years, his opponents challenged his abilities in the ring if all they knew of him was his mat grappling skills. If they knew of him first and foremost as an independent pro wrestler, they challenged whether he could transfer those skills to a 12-by-12 mat. Nowadays all the hotshot rookies think about is mixed martial arts. They want a “real” fight, and they wonder aloud whether a seasoned pro veteran like Jonny has what it takes to grapple submission-style.

Besides betraying a woeful failure in researching what Jonny has accomplished in his previous bouts, and in his long and impressive career as an amateur wrestler, they seem to think that submission wrestling is something that popped up only in the last five years or so. To make matters worse, half these upstarts don’t even know when to tap out, an ignorance that encourages recklessly high self-esteem and endangers themselves and their opponents. Given his background and training in submission wrestling, Ethan probably knows better than to underestimate any opponent, much less Jonny Firestorm, and probably can gauge when he’s in a tight enough fix to warrant tapping out. And knowing what we know of Jonny Firestorm, for Ethan Axel Andrews sake, we certainly hope so!

Ethan Axel Andrews, tall and slender, sporting a skinny Mohawk, all that’s left of his hair once Lon Dumont was finished with him in HairStakes 1, came to us with years of experience on the mats and, more recently, in the squared circle. The Boss and Jonny Firestorm alike have advised him that he might have been a big fish in a small pond before, but now at BG East he faces the “cream of the crop” of wrestling talent. Ethan assured them that that’s exactly what he is looking for, and to his credit, in his months with us, he has shown himself game for every challenge we set before him. When we asked him what he wanted to do next, he announced he wanted a match with Jonny, one of the steeliest wrestlers on the roster. The match was set up, as requested, some of us wondering, however, whether Ethan was self-destructive or just plain masochistic.

Clearly Ethan expects better of himself as an MMA fighter than he is able to muster against Jonny, who is faster, stronger, and wilier than Ethan Axel could have guessed. The veteran easily keeps Ethan short of oxygen, tied in knots and panting in pain for the first third of the match. Ethan can’t get an advantage on Jonny, and Jonny gains one tap-out submission after another because Ethan lays himself open for the same frustrating neck-busting neck-crank again and again. It’s looking like a complete rout of the challenger.

Then, having been repeatedly bested in a legitimate contest, fuming with anger, panting and pacing with pent-up rage, Ethan goes down dark and deep and turns nasty. He drives his boot to Jonny’s ribcage while Jonny is getting up on his feet after yet another victory. He makes illegal use of the ropes to grind his boots to Jonny’s throat and crotch. He busts Jonny’s back to gain a dirty, cheap submission via a fully-weighted boston crab. It’s an eye-popping and stunning reversal of fortune which leaves both Jonny Firestorm and the viewer gasping for air from its ferocity. Boston crab fans will blow a gasket or three!

Leave it to BG East to wrap up The 3 Ages of Jonny with an electrifying twist: Nice-guy Ethan turns heel. The all-American kid who took up martial arts to fend off bullies finds his dark side, and he seems to love it. The MMA rulebook gets tossed out of the ring, and after years of dominating the scene as BGE’s “resident badass,” Jonny’s reputation and career are put in peril by a rash and craven act of underhanded treachery. The final two-thirds of this match is hot, tense, strenuous, and sweaty as Wannabe Heel takes on the Heel of All Heels. Is this Jonny’s swan song, at long last? Or will Jonny get his mojo back in time to beat this ambitious mohawked mofo black and blue? Nominations, please.

Ripe for the Picking?

Many a BG wrestler has made a point of calling out Christian Taylor in order to get close to his classically handsome face and beautifully long, lean, athletic body. Once beaten and subdued, it is a well-known and often discussed fact that Christian invariably melts into full contact lust in the hands of a worthy opponent who’s bested him. But subduing Christian is far easier said than done, and the deceptively lean stud has more than held his own against some of the toughest, most accomplished mat wrestlers that BG East has to offer. He’s chalked up more defeats than victories, but once he’s locked his gorgeous lips on a sweat-soaked opponent after all else is said and done, honestly, everyone’s a winner!

Tino Valencia is one more in a long line of BGE scrappers who’ve set their sights on tasting victory perched atop a conquered Christian Taylor. Tino has wrestled just a few times for BG East, but his credentials in underground and private wrestling are extensive. He has a taste for long, lean, young white boys with something to prove, so it’s no wonder the veteran Latino hunk pulled some strings to get Christian on his fight card. He’s older than Christian, which can mean more aches and pain, but also a depth of experience and expertise that youthfulness can’t always match. Christian is far from a rookie, but Tino is betting he’s still ripe for the picking by steadier, more mature hands like his.

The tone is playful as the they approach the mats. Christian taunts the “old guy,” and Tino shoves him stumbling into the room. Early going, they taunt and test one another, trading rapid fire moves and countermoves in a flurry of twisting limbs. Catching the young stud in a humiliating schoolboy pin, the Latino hunk sneers down at him. “This is gonna be easy!”

“I’m just luring you into a false sense of security,” Christian grins back a moment before executing a violently twisting counter. His tanned, toned body has never been in better shape as he flexes his way to locking a leg back in wrenching single leg boston. He gloats with glee, his big bulging Latin heel buttoned down tightly and groaning in pain.

The playfulness comes to a screeching halt when Tino follows another twisting escape with a snarling, shoulder snapping full nelson/body scissors combination that stretches Christian’s beautiful, long muscles vulnerably. Gone are the grins and chuckles. “You going to let an old guy get you, huh!?” Tino’s taunts no longer sounding nearly so playful. His upper lip curls, hell bent on squeezing out the first fall submission or ripping his young opponent’s arms out at the shoulders, whichever comes first – and maybe both!

Christian submits the first fall, but Tino isn’t satisfied until he’s ripped the board shorts off of his young opponent’s legs. Left in nothing but his sexy designer underwear, Christian’s beautiful bulges distract his veteran opponent. Getting distracted with Christian Taylor on top of you is always a serious mistake! He locks his breathtakingly powerful thighs around Tino’s neck and unbuttons the Latino hunk’s shorts to pry them off. Amply packed pouches bounce and swing as they continue to relentlessly scramble and squeeze.

Tino plays dangerously. That’s the only way he knows to play! He prods and pokes, stoking the burning fuse of his increasingly frustrated young opponent. “I like your nice bubble butt!” Tino presses Christian to the mat. He demonstrates the point by repeatedly pounding and grinding his throbbing package into Christian’s beautiful cheeks. “Come on, scream!” he taunts as Christian’s grunts grow more desperate once he’s trapped between Tino’s punishing thighs. Inch by inch the seasoned veteran prods Christian to the edge of losing control. “Had enough of that, huh, bitch!?” he snarls. “Getting mad?! Good!”

Glistening with sweat, Christian finally shuts up the relentless trash talker with a skull crushing headscissors and hammerlock combination. The sexy Latino has clearly gotten underneath his flawless skin, prodding the notoriously calm and cool Christian into a fit of angry retribution. A ball claw makes Tino second-guess his strategy of raising Christian’s ire. Finding his face trapped in another smothering head scissors, Tino gets a close up view of that bubble butt that he couldn’t keep his hands (or crotch) away from earlier.

Both hunks push one another’s buttons, delivering heaping helpings of domination peppered liberally with withering humiliation. One stud chuckles as he makes his opponent lick his sweat-soaked bicep. Hair pulling, smothering, alternating aggressive punches and amorous strokes, these two highly competitive hardbodied hunks hammer into one another with everything they’ve got until one of them is sleepered out cold with his face smothered by his opponent’s package in a deliciously deep face-to-crotch headscissors. The victor slowly rouses his vanquished challenger with hungry kisses, and the loser wakes up paying homage with an amorous crotch massage. “All right, you won,” the loser admits with a sly grin, before they turn the heat way, way up! Definitely some of the best work from both.

“So, So Much! So Much To Destroy, So Much To Beat On!”

Skotch English came out of nowhere a few years ago to deliver a hardcore, old school, Canadian grizzly style beatdown on an up and coming young face. The big, burly bear daddy brought his particular brand of classic, feet on the ground, head-on body-bashing that harkened back to the “good ol’ days” of 70′s style pro wrestling, when a sexy belly and a neck the size of a sequoia could beat the pretty right of just about anything. His lengthy tour of Yank indy promotions finally brought the snarling Canadian back our way, and he specifically asked for one of our prettiest wrestlers to pick up where he left off.

Few wrestlers have inspired the instant and fanatical fan following that Mitch Colby has. And really, the attraction isn’t hard to understand. 6’2″, 210 pounds, gorgeously tanned, classically handsome, and honed like only a competitive fitness star can be, Mitch strikes a breathtakingly stunning figure of pro perfection when he strides into the arena wearing an American flag warm-up jacket and metallic blue, oh-so-brief butt-hugging trunks. He’s as handsome as ever, sporting just a hint of chest hair that so many of his fans adore. And when he gets a look at 5’7″ Skotch staring down at him from the ring, Mitch scoffs.

“I finally get to meet one of BG East’s pretty boys in person!” Skotch laughs. “Ready for your destruction?” Mitch rolls his eyes. “Oh, more than ready.” Strolling confidently to the mirrored wall, Mitch takes a look at the handsome mug staring back at him. He makes no comment. And no comment is needed. It’s as stunning an entrance as we’ve ever seen.

Skotch apparently agrees: “Let’s see that hot body, fella!” Skotch demands. “That’s what I’m here for. You’re here to amuse me!” Mitch smiles wide as he slowly, seductively strips out of his warm-up jacket and flexes those pecs that have made so many BG East fans swoon. Skotch certainly isn’t the first opponent eager to get an up close look at Mitch’s beautiful body. “So much to destroy,” Skotch mutters. “So much to beat on.” Sentiments shared by many an aggressive BG East heel – many of whom then found themselves on the receiving end of a serious thrashing from our All-American good-guy ring-god.

Skotch challenges his studly opponent to a test of strength. They flex, pecs pounding into pecs. It’s Mitch’s conditioning and height that turn the tide, driving Skotch’s knees to the mat and threatening to snap his wrists. The Canadian bear battles back to his feet and shoots a kick toward Mitch’s groin to bring the big man down, but Mitch is no doe-eyed rookie. He catches Skotch by the ankle, spins him around, hoists him into the air before delivering an atomic drop onto his knee. BG East’s resident dangerous-pretty-boy is all over the Canadian, nearly ripping off his head with a clothesline and hip tossing him back and forth from corner to corner until Skotch can barely climb back up to his knees. “What do you got!?” Mitch yells in face. “So far, nothing!” He flexes his mouthwatering guns and chuckles. “I don’t think you’re near as tough as you think you are!” Oh really?….

Mitch probably shouldn’t dismiss the rumors regarding Skotch’s level of toughness. The Canadian brawler proceeds to drop the handsome hunk with a wicked punch to the gut and then pounds Mitch’s classic countenance face-first into the turnbuckle. Trapped and cornered against the turnbuckles, Mitch can only sit back and take it as Skotch rains down blows into the big man’s big round pecs and rippled gut. “Look at these abs!” Skotch pauses to admire. “They’re rock hard, that’s for sure!” he laughs, launching into a renewed attempt to jackhammer away at mighty Mitch’s very inviting core and chest.

Mitch’s pecs are too big and beautiful of targets for the horny Canadian to resist. Punches and claws make the big man’s chest burn bright red as Skotch zeroes in on tearing him to shreds. “What d’ya say, big man!? I’m going to rip those fucking pecs right off!”

The moment Skotch overestimates the damage he’s inflicted on his truly pretty, but nonetheless veteran opponent, Mitch makes a comeback for some payback! Skotch is whipped like a wicked stepchild into all four corners, softening up his back before Mitch hoists the beefy bear up in a gorgeous bearhug that makes the snarling Canadian a suddenly whimpering simp. Apparently in Canadian there’s no word for “submit,” because Skotch refuses to say it even as he blacks out from the pain. His pouch perched proudly in a schoolboy pin atop the slack jawed bad boy, Mitch slaps down an incredibly slow three count, pausing extensively between each count to flex and kiss his sweaty biceps.

Awake again and a little wiser, Skotch starts Fall 2 more cautiously. “Is that all you got?” Mitch taunts. “I thought you Canadian boys were tough.” If there’s one thing that Skotch most definitely IS, it’s tough. He neutralizes his opponent’s height advantage by taking him to the mats. When Mitch succeeds in wrapping those stunning, tanned, powerful legs around the bulldog’s waist, Skotch counters with an excruciating toe-hold. Stuck in a trap of his own making, Mitch is desperate reverse course, struggling to pry himself free. Damage done, Skotch grabs hold of the momentum and drives home the equalizer submission with a full-fisted crotch claw that has beautiful Mitch screaming for release.

The decisive, final minutes of this match are a study in strength and perseverance as both accomplished wrestlers pound away on each other. Up by the hair and then right back down again with ball claws and brutal punches, one of these fierce competitors literally gets his face dragged humiliatingly through pools of his own sweat. No one is admitting defeat, so it takes knocking one of these powerful men out cold to settle the score for good. A big, beautiful, hefty package planted on the loser’s slack mouth sets the stage for an incredibly satisfying three count victory. Another hot and horny, bound-to-be classic BGE pro action match between two very talented and sweaty big heavyweight hunks.

Jonny the Resident, Hairy, Beefy Badass

Paladin came to BG East with a mask on his face and a chip on his shoulder. Smooth, statuesque, sinewy, and standoffish, he made no bones about his feeling that the other wrestlers were not in his league or about his contempt for BGE fans. Even after Silver Joe Robbins stripped the mask off him in Masked Mayhem 5 and then gave him a sound drubbing too, Paladin felt his indy pro experience still put him several notches above everybody else. He acted as if he were slumming just by appearing in our ring and constantly looked as if he had been vaguely offended by a rank and unwholesome smell.

When resident trainer Jonny Firestorm gamely offered to take him on for the other half of Paladin’s two-match contract, Paladin could not hide his smug amusement over the fact that his next challenge would come from a man a full foot shorter, who, by his own admission, had “let his hair grow and obviously been out of the gym for a while.”

At this point in his career, Jonny was BG East’s “hooker,” an old pro-wrestling term for an experienced fighter promoters sometimes call in to break or “hook” a troublesome upstart or anybody grumbling about the pay or management. So Jonny’s offer was not as casual and offhand as it at first appeared. The Boss had summoned him to cut six-foot-six Paladin down to size. But in Fall 1, the body beautiful, exhibiting a knowledge of scientific wrestling equal to his finely toned physique, puts up a very respectable fight against Jonny, a competitor who is anything but a slouch in the ring, and, biggest surprise of all, manages to wring an agonizing submission out of the very man hired to kick his ass.

Evidently, Jonny and the Boss had seriously underestimated The Powers of Paladin. “Big oaf,” Jonny calls him, bristling with anger and revving up to giant-slayer mode. “Where’s my slingshot? Did you take the beanstalk here?” Full of himself, Paladin drops to his hands and knees for the amateur wrestling referee’s start position, a deliberate provocative challenge, not to mention an insult to Jonny’s legitimate wrestling creds. Big mistake!

Paladin may be, as he indelicately points out, “younger, faster, and in better condition” than Jonny, but Jonny Firestorm, with his Napoleonic haircut and ninja-edition-Teddy-Ruxpin fur, knows how to take advantage of a situation and, love him or hate him, he does whatever it takes – and has the skills – to get the job done.

When Paladin drops to the ref’s position, Jonny buries the toe of his boot in the kid’s ribs, dramatically turning the tables on him. He rolls Paladin over and crushes his windpipe with the bottom of his foot and then drags him by the hair to the ropes, choking him still more against the bottom rope. Paladin winds up with his back to the turnbuckle while Jonny gains a corner mount that elevates him to the youngster’s height, from which vantage he proceeds to pummel Paladin’s face with his left bicep, hard as most men’s fists.

“You know what the hardest part of this is?” Jonny boasts, having taken the 2nd fall. “Being so good!” But once again height, youth, and fitness work to Paladin’s advantage. Paladin fires back and gives Jonny another wholly unexpected and wildly impressive smackdown. Triumphant, Paladin strikes poses, sizing himself up in the mirror, complaining only that Fall 3 had made him break into a sweat from “carrying [Jonny] around.”

Jonny, barely conscious, crawls to Paladin’s feet, seemingly as a plea for mercy, only to drive his fist up to Paladin’s nut sack. In total disregard of the scheduled three-fall format, the heated melee continues, now with a chaotic emphasis on some brutal ball bashing. In the breathtaking climax, the victor catches the loser in an intricate submission hold that also succeeds in pinning the man’s shoulders to the mat. Both pinned and trapped in an excruciating punishment hold, the loser is humiliatingly forced to count himself out! You’ll have to see this match to believe it, and the finisher especially is something BG East fans will be talking about for years to come! Destined for a 2013 “Best Of” nomination?

The rookie Brian Baker has traveled a long way from the west coast to join Rock Hard, determined to prove his towering 6’4”, 205 lbs incredible physique will prove no match for the reigning muscle studs on the roster. And though he’s an award winning collegiate athlete, he doesn’t have any experience wrestling in the ring. But that does not deter the giant from insisting he takes on the big, brawny red head Austin Cooper in his debut match. This intriguing match opens with both warriors coming to the center of the ring, chest to chest, well sort of, as Brian looks down on his opponent with a sneer on his face. Coop doesn’t fear anyone and stands toe to toe with the big guy, not giving an inch. Brian strikes first, hoisting Coop up into a front facing bearhug, He squeezes hard on the red head’s lower back in a display of power, that is until Coop is able to connect with a forearm to the giant’s chest and break free. Austin backs him into the corner and starts bashing away at his abs. He knows he needs to wear the big guy down and get him to the mat in order to negate the considerable height difference. Coop is quick to suplex the giant down to the mat, then places him a camel clutch, wanting to return the favor of showing who’s the boss in this ring. Coop starts attacking his long, lean muscled body with his extensive arsenal of holds he’s built over the last few years. Austin wraps his huge muscled thighs around Brian’s waist and starts squeezing as fierce as he can wanting to sap the strength out of that 6’4’ frame. He makes Brian suffer in a reverse wrist lock, then delivers a number of fist thrusts into his tanned sternum. He continues to inflict pain on the goliath; stretching Brian’s back and long legs out in a boston crab, then makes him squirm in an MMA style arm bar before picking him up and dropping his lanky frame down across his knee in an over the knee backbreaker. Coop is in total control of the giant, as Brian cries out in pain, and Coop forcing his hand down on Brian’s chin as he stretches his towering physique out in a way that Brian has likely never felt before. Coop further torments the rookie shoving his fingers down deep into his ripped abs in a powerful claw hold, and as Brian agonizes on the mat, Coop stands up and flexes his mammoth biceps and ridicules him saying, ‘you know, if you worked out and had guns like this, you might stand a chance’. Coop continues to dominate his oversized opponent, suplexing his tall physique across the ring, and even though Brian is able to get a couple shots in on Coop’s abs while backed into the corner turnbuckle, Austin controls the action in the final minutes of round one. Austin, the tactician, systematically softens the rookie giant up with a full nelson and grapevine combo that stretches his muscles out to the max. When Coop senses he has the rookie ripe for the kill, he drags him to his feet, marches him across the ring, and then proceeds to lace his tall, lanky body between the ring ropes and places him an abdominal stretch. Brain’s impressive physique is stretched out and on full display as Coop applies intense pressure. Coop demands that he submits, and when Brian refuses to give, Coop ratchets up the pain with some ab bashing, until the rookie ultimately submits. Coop makes him suffer an additional five seconds as a punishment for not submitting sooner. Coop pulls him out of the ropes, shoves him to the mat, then places his black boot on the giant’s chest and flexes a massive double bicep shot towering over the fallen giant.

Brian, seemingly undeterred from the beating he just took, struts out of his corner, proclaims he’s still strong, then challenges the brawny redhead to an arm wrestling showdown. Coop is amused by the challenge, asks the rookie if he’s serious, then flashes an intimidating bicep shot. The two of them lie down on the mat, lock up in this test of strength. The giant gains the early advantage and nearly powers Coop’s wrist to the mat, but Coop was just playing with him and in the end forces the rookie’s wrist to the mat. They come to their feet with Coop gloating ‘what did I tell you’ then shoves the lofty collegiate athlete in the chest and back into the corner. Austin continues were he left off in round one, by dishing out another ab bashing on Brian’s chiseled six pack. Coop then tosses him to the mat and spreads and splits his long, lanky legs apart, stretching his hamstrings and his crotch. Coop ponders a wish as he practically splits the giant apart, while Brian is moaning out in some serious pain. Coop continues to dominate the action, clamping on a full nelson and imposing his will on Brian’s gigantic, tanned physique. Just as it seems like this will be a total squash, Brian seizes an opening, draws on his previous scholastic wrestling experience and is able secure a reverse , then go on the attack. Brian stomps away with is white boots on Coop’s fair skinned body. He chokes him over the ropes, then wraps his long, lanky legs around Coop’s waist and tries to squeeze the shit out of him. The rookie makes the mistake of never asking for Coop to submit, and Coop is able to endure the predicament and change the momentum. The burly ginger backs Brian back into his corner, connects with a few kicks and fists into his gut, wanting to soften him up and get him back down to the mat. Coop truly dishes out the punishment in the final few minutes of this rookie squash, inflicting torture on Brian’s long, lean muscles; first by draping his worn out body over his back in a crucifix, then securing a tight figure four leg lock on his long legs, and stretching his muscles out in a bow and arrow while he’s withering on the mat, before ultimately hoisting the 6’4” giant up over his shoulders into a torture rack that compels the rookie to scream out a submission at the top of his lungs to put an end to the misery. Coop flings him off his shoulders and down to the mat, he calls him pathetic and flexes his massive muscular body in triumph as the sweat glistens off his muscles in a two round squash job!

Asking for an Ass-Kicking, or, Muscle Don’t Mean Shit!

Reese Wells paces BG East’s Florida patio mats like a caged animal waiting for his opponent to arrive. Reese’s tenure at BG East has not gone as planned. The aspiring young pro wrestler is blessed with an angelic face paired with a breathtakingly lean, powerfully muscled physique born of freakish genetic gifts and a fanatical devotion to physical conditioning. His plan was to bank some hours training for his shot at a big time, mainstream pro wrestling audition while teaching the BG East stable a thing or two about “real” wrestling. Indeed, he scored a couple of notable victories on the mats.

However, Reese’s matches in the ring have been a long series of increasingly brutal and sexually humiliating defeats. Reese’s skimpy bullseye thong was no match for the big boner induced by Jonny Firestorm’s beating on Ball Bash 2. His double teaming unmasking by Cage Thunder and Lightning Rod on Masked Mayhem 9 left him stripped and streaked with heel jizz. Reese’s reputation around here is dangerously close to becoming that of a hard luck, hardcore, well-hung jobber. Reese is pinning his hopes for redeeming that reputation on calling out gutter punk Billy Lodi for hot match in the Florida sun.

Reese is ripped to shreds, his comic book hero proportions capped off by thick, pumped pecs and an insanely narrow waist tapering inside incredibly tight swim trunks. Reese despises “unprofessional behavior.” He hates to be kept waiting. He hate’s “skinny” gutter punks like Billy Lodi, and, oh yeah, he HATES wrestlers who show up in baggy shorts.

“You gonna wrestle in THAT!?” he asks, furious at the mere sight of his opponent’s attire once laid back Billy arrives. “You can’t wrestle in that! It’s not professional!!!”

“I wear whatever I want,” cocky Billy shoots back, adding a slapping shove into Reese’s lovely, bulging chest to drive home the point. Reese’s cute face flashes hot red anger.

“You’re asking for an ass kicking!” Reese boasts, quickly wrapping his peak-a-boo biceps around Billy’s head to instantly take charge. There’s no contest when it comes to strength. Reese can milk agony out of a simple headlock for days and days on lean smoker Billy. He takes the gutter punk to the mat and rips off the offending baggy shorts, leaving Billy with nothing but his sexy underwear. Having forcibly won the point about professional attire, the aspiring pro rips apart his opponent’s legs and begins to wrench Billy’s knee dangerously, quickly scoring the first submission. With the advantage and Billy’s trunks in hand, Reese’s confidence, like his gorgeous pecs, swell. Already he can feel the stench of humiliation at the hands of BG East’s most notorious heels washing off of him in the Florida breeze.

This is most definitely not Billy Lodi’s first dance. Like Reese, he’s often underestimated for his youthful appearance, but win or lose, not one of Billy’s opponent’s has come out of a confrontation unscathed. And he’s faced far more intimidating opponents than achingly pretty Reese Wells. “You’re awfully scrawny,” he snaps, directly challenging Reese’s claim to pro standing. To prove the point further, Billy tackles him to the mat and pounds on his rock hard abs. Never a pushover, Billy grabs Reese by the hair and yells in his face. “Not so tough! Feel good, huh?” he snarls, slapping Reese’s ass. “Come on, fight back!”

Neither of these rough and tumble jocks will go down without a seriously vicious fight. Reese counters with stunningly gorgeous bodyscissors that makes Billy squirm like a bug. Flexing and pumping his ripped thighs, Reese works Billy’s internal organs like squeezing the last ounce of toothpaste from the tube. With the aspiring pro’s big, juicy bulge propped so enticingly near, Billy couldn’t help himself if he wanted to (he didn’t). He viciously claws Reese’s pieces, twisting with a sadistic grin growing on the punk’s face. “Submit you little bitch!” The stunned “professional” chokes and sputters, holding out impressively before finally gasping out his obedient submission – 3 times! – because Billy doesn’t hear so well.

Reese can feel the mantle of a Pretty Boy Jobber beginning to rest on his granite carved shoulders, and he doesn’t like the feeling one bit. Abandoning professional ethics and sportsmanship altogether, he sinks to his opponent’s level and hits back with some of the dirty tricks he’s been subjected to by his betters at BG East. He chokes Billy with his own shorts and drags the punk around the mat with them. Reese yanks him up by his hair, hurling taunts and insults. Repeated over-the-knee backbreakers leave Billy weeping in pain. An wicked standing headscissors makes Billy turn beet red, finally submitting even as Reese keeps him locked up tight to flex his baseball biceps for the adoring camera.

There are no fewer than 17(!) wailing submissions as Reese and Billy are hell bent on punishing one another. Billy’s prime targetsare slapping Reese’s sweet ass and clawing those bulbous pecs. Reese focuses on snapping Billy’s “skinny” limbs, determined to mess up his knees with vicious leg locks, and threatening to snap his elbows with arm bars.

Billy gets a rise out of Reese’s sweat stained trunks the harder he makes the aspiring pro hurt. We also can’t begrudge Billy his occasional stroking and groping Reese’s stunning muscles. However, fans may be surprised by how closely contested this mat battle is fought all the way to the very last moment, when one of these fierce young fighters is finally knocked out cold and cock-pinned, proving once and for all who’s the jobber here.

Something to Prove…

Aron Mobley made a big impression debuting 3 years ago against Joshua Goodman. Then again, when you’re 6’1″ tall and 200 pounds, you tend to make big impressions. With wrestling credentials primarily limited to frat house horsing around, Aron did remarkably well in pushing notorious Mr. Joshua to his limits in the tight confines of the Wrestle Shack. Along the way, he developed a taste for slapping down egos of big, beautiful narcissists like Joshua. So when he showed up on our doorstep again recently, The Boss decided to test whether the handsome hunk next door could take on another of our most notorious egos, this time in the ring. It turned out to be a very serendipitous match-up!

To say Kieran Dunne has come a long way since Mr. Joshua first “welcomed” him to BG East would be a gross understatement. He’s morphed in body and spirit in that time, growing from an achingly pretty 18 year old physique-phenom into a pro wrestling powerhouse. Kieran has packed on more than 35 pounds of big, beefy muscle since he first showed up, and when he doesn’t get distracted admiring his own body beautiful in the mirror, he can pose a serious threat. Sure, he’s been a muscle-packed punching bag for more than half of the BG East stable, but when he shows up with something to prove (other than how fine he looks), he can hold his own against some of the best.

When big Aron steps over the top rope into the ring, Kieran is yet again lost in lust over his own mirror image. If you looked that good, you’d understand the problem. Still babyfaced, but with mature muscle, Kieran is unquestionably eye-catching. But long, beautiful Aron is hard to ignore, even for self-adoring Kieran. “What do we have here, a fucking giraffe!” Kieran snarls, turning and staring the full half a foot upward at his leering opponent.

“What are you,” Aron snaps back dismissively, “a fucking dwarf!?” Hyped up on adrenaline and testosterone, really that’s all it takes to get young hotheads like these two going. Shoves back and forth demonstrate that both are powerful hunks. Kieran challenges the “giraffe” to a test of strength. Possibly physics isn’t Kieran’s strong suit, because Aron takes advantage of every inch he has over his shorter opponent to pour on the power, slowly forcing Kieran to his knees. “Is that all you got? Come on!!!” the tallboy crows.

That’s far from all Kieran’s got, having been twisted and tortured by a phalanx of our most sadistic wrestlers over the years. Kieran determines to make fratboy Aron pay for underestimating what years of getting his ass kicked has taught him about wrestling.

Early going, it looks like Kieran showed up to wrestle this time, rather than just make love to the mirror! When Aron attempts to post him to a corner, the savvy veteran reverses, pounding the tall man’s back into the buckles. He posts him from corner to corner, before scooping and bodyslamming Aron brutally in the center of the ring. Before the frat boy can take a breath, Kieran follows up with a huge flying elbow drop into his gut, demonstrating just a few of the lessons he’s learned since Mr. Joshua first took him to school five years ago. “That’s right,” he crows, indulging in a moment of self-congratulations, sneaking a quick look at himself in the mirror. “It just doesn’t get any easier!”

Then again, nothing has ever come easy for Kieran at BGE, and Aron is no exception. The moment Kieran lets up even a fraction, the frat-boy-turned-narcissist-basher stomps the shit out of him. “How do you like that, bitch!?” he spits, flexing in Kieran’s mirror. A stunning kidney crushing bearhug makes beefy Kieran flail like a fish out of water. “Do you like that?” he asks rhetorically, speaking as much to BG East fans of muscle bashing as he is to Kieran. “You got no more fight in you! You fucking pussy, you done!?” This time, Kieran’s done, tapping out and finding himself flung to the mat once again.

Kieran comes back with guns blazing. Trapping the frat boy’s skull between his powerpacked thighs, Kieran makes the big man groan and squirm. There’s little finesse with two raging bulls and power moves dominate the match. Kieran bodyslams him repeatedly, pounding Aron’s lower back to mush before rolling him ass upward and slapping down a legitimate 3-count pin on the big man. “Fucker! Not so tough now, huh?”

Kieran throws everything he’s got into breaking the big man’s back, while Aron latches his claws into Keiran’s huge, round pecs and goes for broke trying to rip him apart at the seams. They lay down layer upon layer of psychological warfare, trash talking like only 20-something muscleboys can. “You can’t take these 22 inch arms!” Keiran snarls as Aron goes limp. Moments later, Aron traps Kieran’s arms between the ropes and goes to town pounding his vulnerable pecs. “That’s what you call a man! A TALL man, you bitch!”

Past the point of exhaustion, lying in deep pools of their own sweat, they go full tilt until one fierce fighter finds himself trapped in a shocking sleeper, forced to face the mirror and watch himself fade into unconsciousness as his cocky opponent flexes behind him. “Hey, wake up, Sally! Remember who did this to you!” the grinning victor insists, leaving the loser to try to piece together what just happened. Hot, sweaty and seriously sexy!